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Explain

Kris: I live in the gay district in San Francisco. Person: What is a gay district? Kris: Well, it’s like…San Francisco is a pretty gay city, but the gay district is even gayer. Person: How can a district be gay? Kris: Well, it has a lot of gay men living there, and…there’s a big rainbow … Continue reading »

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Still at large

Let me begin by saying that we did not get arrested this weekend, or even pulled over, so those of you who love me so much that you were counting out rosary beads for me all weekend: thanks, and you can stop now. Jacob and Lisa’s wedding was beautiful. Gorgeous location, many tears. (Lisa cried, … Continue reading »

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With a capital T that stands for Tahoe

I got the new wheels smogged yesterday and was planning to head to the DMV today, but it turns out all California DMVs are closed today by edict of the Governor. Now, Schwarzenegger has hated me ever since I told him I wasn’t that into Total Recall, but I was expecting him to come at … Continue reading »

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Wheels up

We are vehicular! Yes, gentle readers, my intended and I are once again owners of four-wheeled motorized transport and boy, does it feel good. Owning a car feels, to me, like the essence of being an American. It’s something about having a little walled-off space that’s all your own — very different from being on … Continue reading »

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Orchestra

I went to see Romeo and Juliet at the San Francisco Ballet last night. Kati’s mom had to miss it, so I got to use her ticket. Wow. I always thought the cheap seats were just fine for the ballet. Sure, you’re too far away to see facial expressions, but you can see the shifting … Continue reading »

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Prince

Our realtor on our most recent home tour looked like a Disney prince. He was all square angles — square jaw, square shoulders — and appeared hand-drawn. I kept waiting for him to burst into song. He could rhyme “sweeping views” with “HOA dues,” “Victorian charm” with “costs a leg and an arm,” and “second … Continue reading »

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You snooze — do you always lose?

Last night I watched Michele and Katy take a swathe of fabric and make a dress out of it. It was pretty astonishing. I’d like to learn to sew (and pin patterns straight, and cut fabric, neither of which proved to be among my current talents) but where would I put the sewing machine? It’s … Continue reading »

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Crab slider

Our Dr. Doolittle neighbor works at an extremely fancy bar downtown and last night we went to visit him at work. He saved us a table by the window and when we arrived, proceeded to ply us with champagne, wine and martinis, exciting appetizers and an enormous plate of dessert samplers. All free. Just before … Continue reading »

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Holy bluejay!

I just glanced outside and saw my building manager standing in the yard with his hand stretched out. He stood there for a long time — thirty seconds, maybe? — until I started thinking “How long does it take to figure out it’s not raining?” And then a blue jay landed on his hand! Which … Continue reading »

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One thousand penguins

Amazon is selling the complete Penguin Classics library (1,082 titles) for a little over eight thousand dollars. Want! Want! Want! Want! Want! It might be worth moving to Alameda to have space for 700 pounds of story.

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