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Author Archives: didofoot

Dick’s

Kris: “I’m lusting after a $500 pair of boots right now. It’s pretty sick.” Gene: “Yeah.” Kris: “I mean, even if you have limitless funds, is it ever okay to spend $500 on shoes?” Gene: “No. If you have $500 to just throw away, you do something interesting with it. You buy Dick’s hamburgers for … Continue reading »

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“The philosophy of materialism holds that the only thing that exists is matter.”

Waaaant. American Retro Ginger coat in black ($292.60); Colin Stuart over-the-knee black boots ($189); Frye Matilda red boots ($448); The Complete Calvin and Hobbes ($94.50); “Hapworth 16, 1924” by J.D. Salinger ($500).

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Tumnus

“I mean this guy was fully hairy. All over.” “He could shave his chest.” “Yeah, but what was he gonna do, shave his whole back and chest and leave the bottom half hairy?” “Like Mr. Tumnus!” [Blank looks.] “The faun in Narnia?” “So he strips for some girl and then goes ‘It’s okay, I’m just … Continue reading »

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Summer in San Francisco

Happy weekend, y’all. (Michele took the one in the hat.)

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CHD

You missed Lombard Street being turned into a giant Candyland board…what are you going to miss next? If you’re smart, the answer will not be “the Caspian Hat Dance show at Ashkenaz tonight.” Caspian Hat Dance is Allen’s band (come on, you remember Allen: smart, pretty, moved to Amsterdam? Hell, four of my six readers … Continue reading »

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love neighborhood

Last night, turning onto my street around midnight, I passed a guy wearing a Cal hat, a whistle on a string and nothing else. He seemed undistressed so we exchanged smiles and moved on.

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Tart

One of my neighbors left a stack of home design magazines free for the taking in the lobby yesterday. After a day of work and house-cleaning, they were the perfect reward. Beautiful as they are, seeing the rooms in these magazines makes me more content with my living space. We could still do with less … Continue reading »

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Reading my ocean book

From the entry on fairy basslets: “The larger, more colorful males […] defend a harem of females. As they grow larger, the females change sex and turn into males.” Does that not blow your mind? This is not my gender-bending fish.

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My favorite night

We went skinny dipping after dark. Marina sat on the edge of the speedboat and lit sparklers for us and we swam out into the black lake (heedless of the seven-foot sturgeon or other lake monsters) and performed drunken sparkling water ballets. On the far reaches of the landscape a lightning storm flashed at the … Continue reading »

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Spots

I spent some time in a hospital this past weekend. One of the doctors was almost certainly younger than me, a mere hobbledehoy covered in pimples and good intentions. This Howser kept absently prodding my grandfather’s gouty knee as he discussed him, as if to include him in the conversation without doing anything so gauche … Continue reading »

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