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Tagged With: Friends

Forks road trip: the living dead

We used the bathroom and bought chips at a gas station in one of the numberless three-building towns on Highway 101. As we left, the woman behind the counter dully called out “See you soon.” See you soon? “If we were in a horror movie,” I said as we pulled away, “that would mean ‘See … Continue reading »

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Forks road trip: roadside assistance

On the road from Queets, Michele and I stopped to assist a woman who’d skidded her car into a ditch. Neither of us is much accustomed to offering roadside assistance so the stop had an adventurous flair. The girl who’d had the accident was large and encased in a Barbie-pink sweatshirt that featured a picture … Continue reading »

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Spring Makeover

Blow-dry hair. Tanning booth. Plenty of rest. Healthful exercise. Exfoliate feet with baseball diamond. More makeover tips.

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Adventure Island

Captain Redscarf: “How d’ye like me tattoo, salty wench?” Island Princess: “It’s peeling.” Captain Redscarf: “Aye. Me tattoo artist be a poxy drunken knave.” Island Princess, politely: “Oh, be he?” Finer Things attempted to read Robinson Crusoe this month, but failed, because it’s hard to spend three hundred pages with an utter douchebag. No one … Continue reading »

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Mushroom cloud, silver lining

Discussing whether you’d have to filter your water after the apocalypse: Michele: “But why wouldn’t we have running water?” Gene: “If the electricity goes off for a week…” Michele: “Water and electricity are separate.” Kris: “But if the electricity goes off for a week, it means the system has fully crashed.” Michele, nodding thoughtfully: “Fire … Continue reading »

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Three weeks to go

Today I woke to a morning worn thin by repetition. I lay staring at the clock as it clicked steadily towards 6:15 and barely even had the energy to fight with the sleeping Lad for the covers which we both try to roll ourselves in like human burritos. (His superior mass is effective in trapping … Continue reading »

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And you thought no one would remember…

Stay nobody, birthday boy. Photo brazenly stolen from CB himself.

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Twenty years and counting

I wonder who I was those first four years of my life without you around to record me. I wonder who you were. If I have a sister it’s you; if I have a conscience it’s you. I’ve spent my life trying to catch up with you and here you go again, 25 before me. … Continue reading »

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Happy birthday, Danny!

My first strong memory of Dan is when he came out with some of the crew to a movie during our freshman year of high school. My mom picked him up and was as surprised as me that he was so startlingly articulate around a parent (a feat which only my girl scout troop and … Continue reading »

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You thought he went to South America…

But in fact he was loved up and turned into a toad. Happy birthday, Bunny!

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