General
My faulty understanding of financial realities
ME: I found a perfect house for us to buy. [Shows ad for perfect house.] GENE: We can’t afford that. ME: I thought you could get a real estate loan? GENE: Not for that much. ME: It seems like if we want it bad enough, the extra money should just appear. GENE: Nope, because we … Continue reading
In which I am captured by hair dressers
It’s 2:30 on Wednesday afternoon and I’m sitting in a hotel suite while two strangers fondle my hair. Alas, it’s not the prelude to an orgy blog: it’s fashion. While striding along in my dressy togs today, late for a fancy-pants luncheon/fund-raiser, I was stopped by a lovely girl who gave me a flyer that … Continue reading
Please. Stop.
A few weeks ago, I was heading downtown to meet my dad. Zooming through the MUNI tunnels with my nose in a book, I finally noticed we were zooming faster than usual. In fact, “I can’t stop,” said the conductor apologetically — and said again, with rising panic, as we whizzed through Civic Center and … Continue reading
Clouds
I’m having this memory today, maybe triggered by the lowering skies, of the first time I went to Gene’s house, back when we were kids. His mom made us lemonade and looked delighted to see me (a welcome I would have thought I’d wear out in thirteen-odd years, but no, bless her). Gene and I … Continue reading
Newsom sings the hits
Last night, my dad took me to see Gavin Newsom being interviewed at the Commonwealth Club. Some highlights: Interviewer: Let’s talk about sports. Newsom: Sports are important…but ultimately, sports are games, they’re fun, they’re just games. Interviewer: And they’re big business. Newsom: Like I said. I chuckle to myself. To millionaire mayor Newsom, big business … Continue reading
Exposing journalism’s seedy underbelly
I had my first press conference today. (“Why are you holding a press conference?” a confused friend asked, but no. Attended my first press conference.) Here are some of the things I learned: Your word is good enough for us. All I had to do to score a press kit was to walk up and … Continue reading
Fun with TV
Gene: Wait, what’s Buffy doing here? I thought you were watching Angel. Kris: I am. It’s a crossover episode. Sometimes one of them comes to the other one’s show and it’s called a crossover. Gene: Oh. Angel: Dammit, Buffy, you can’t just come into MY town… Gene: …on MY show, and start throwing your weight … Continue reading
Restoring Law and Order in Iraq
Today, the Chronicle reported on American soldiers’ efforts to bring safety and security to the people of Iraq: A platoon sergeant warned [an Iraqi family] that the kidnappers might be back to finish the job and that the Americans could not provide permanent guards. […] “If I were you, I’d sit in here with a … Continue reading
Go lie down, stupid.
Me: I mean, I’m just starting to wonder what’s the point of trying to launch this writing career. What’s the point of trying to be a writer, you know? Gene: Uh huh. Me: Or of anything really. If we’re just going to die. Eventually. What is the point of doing anything. Gene: Uh huh. Me: … Continue reading
I don’t have time to fool around with you circus animals
I’ve got my first assignment for the new paper. (Which will not replace the old paper, never fear. Dogz 4 Lyfe!) I’ll need to do three interviews for this article, which of course scares the hell out of me. All interviews scare the hell out of me. Seriously, journalism is maybe the worst idea you … Continue reading