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Posted by on April 2, 2007

Since living with Gene, my habits have changed to suit his lifestyle. Here are just three examples of the old Gene and the new me:

1. Gene has long been a proponent of generic purchases; I still feel brand loyalty, but my loyalty is now exclusively reserved for Safeway Select products. I even purchase Safeway Select coffee, even though it’s fairly awful, because it’s something like $3 a can. (Gene’s parents, who maintain their brand loyalty to Chock Full o’Nuts, still compliment my coffee whenever they come over. Initially I typed that as “Chock Full o’Nits,” which I think would be a good monkey coffee name if you ever need one.)

2. I no longer fear sandwiches. My whole life, I’ve been a sandwich purist; hardly anything at all goes on my sandwiches, and usually it’s just cheese between bread slices. But now and then Gene — whose close friends once identified “sandwiches” as his number one character flaw — asks me to make him a sandwich on a weekend. Suddenly my own sandwiches are towering stacks of ingredients. We both get excited when it’s time for a sandwich, and sometimes I do a little dance.

3. I am more value-conscious, or “cheaper,” than I used to be. For example, my ten year high school reunion is happening in October and I’m trying to decide whether or not to attend. Not because I’m afraid of meeting old classmates, but because it’s sure to cost money. How much is this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity worth to me? Twenty dollars? Forty dollars? If there was a Safeway Select version of the reunion, I’d be a lot happier.

(Incidentally, if you haven’t yet gotten the reunion evite and you want to, contact me and I’ll forward it.)

7 Responses to Ch-ch-changes

  1. Jacob

    My ten year is also happening this year (in August). How much am I expected to pay for this once-in-a-lifetime chance for awkwardness? Twenty dollars? Forty dollars? Try SEVENTY AMERICAN DOLLARS. In other words: “I got an invitation from my high school the other day. Opened it, read it, it said they were suckers.”

  2. michele

    i forgot that all of you would be having yours too! i’m assuming that $70 is only for the admission and not for travel to WA. i wonder if erica will go to hers, or jason. you can all come to mine if you like, i bet. i’m sure i can bring at least one date.

    how much did gene’s cost last year? i thought it was like 50-60 from adam’s invitation. but i can’t remember.

  3. didofoot

    Gene’s was $60, he says. But anything under $100 has to be worth it, right? It still costs less than prom tickets, you don’t have to wear taffeta or tulle, and you’re positively encouraged to drink at the event.

  4. robyn

    >$100 is definitely a bargain for an entire evening of alcohol, one-up/downmanship, and boatloads of self-loathing.

    Note to Susie Goetz: You better not be planning one of these. I’m serious.

  5. robyn hates math

    I mean <.

  6. tracy

    i’ll dress you for free. you can borrow my clothes and such. see? so far, FREE.

  7. docta v

    No way am I getting jobbed out of more money for lame high school events. Let’s hit a bar instead.

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