The plain fact is, one of you has stolen my Thurber and I need it back now. I need the racist, sexist humor, and I need the cartoons about seals. So please, if you stole it, give it back to me.
Alternately, and this is more likely, if I loaned it to you, aren’t you done by now? These stories, they’re not so long. What are you, retarded, that it takes you this long to read a book of Thurber? Besides, if you give it back I promise you can borrow this lovely Saki.