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All this to avoid learning any more Anthro terms

Posted by on March 3, 2005

Here I am enjoying our love palace alone again. The Lad and I can’t seem to coordinate our schedules these days, which is odd since he maps his out in writing for all to see. Very odd, when you think about it. I’ve come to the conclusion that one of us is probably having affair, and if the past 11 years have taught me anything it’s that it’s unlikely to be him. But who am I sleeping with? I’ve been watching myself suspiciously for days, trying to determine whether my behavior has been different lately, and once I even had myself followed although it turned out I only went to the grocery store. I hate when I get jealous like this. Left alone, I obsessively check my call logs in my cellphone for new numbers; I rummage through my underwear drawer looking for love notes. Once I even read my email, but I didn’t find anything. I’m so ashamed of myself, but what else can I do? If something’s going on, I’ve surely got a right to know.

9 Responses to All this to avoid learning any more Anthro terms

  1. Kristina

    Maybe you should call “Cheaters,” that’s the only way to really be sure. That way you can confront and fight with yourself on national television, which is how all Americans should resolve their problems from now on.

  2. holohan

    Just remember what Alicia Keyes says – “Eatin’ ain’t cheatin’.”

  3. Dianna

    Kristen, this is glorious. When I got to “Once I even read my email, but I didn’t find anything,” I burst into giggles and made Jacob come over and read it. Then he burst into giggles too. Lovely.

  4. didofoot

    well i aim to please.

  5. didofoot

    (but i shoot to kill.)

  6. Dianna

    I kill what I eat.

    Spinach deserves it, the slimy green bastard.

  7. didofoot

    it’s a kill or be spinach world out there.

  8. Dianna

    I’m probably spinach, then. I’m trying to grow some of it this year…. so I can kill it.

  9. didofoot

    you are what you eat, which i guess makes everyone cannibals.

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