Call For Papers

I have decided it’s time to get an enormous tattoo on my back. This will consist of a beautiful, wise, personally meaningful yet universally appealing quotation from one of my favorite authors, set in an attractive font snaking sideways up my spine.

But what to choose? There have been so many phrases over my lifetime which have been important to me. For example, who can forget that cloudy Seattle day when Adam Miller dubbed me (in the words of the immortal Red Hot Chili Peppers) a “rollercoaster…of love”? And that is only the beginning. There are Debbie Gibson lyrics, Luann punch lines, taglines from commercials…the only difficulty will be settling on just one incredibly meaningful sentence. And then translating it into Chinese or Japanese characters.

Please help me out, gentle readers. The only thing that will make this tattoo more significant will be knowing that its inspiration came from a bored stranger who was searching the internet for pictures of the singer Dido’s feet.

Hey, what about a Dido lyric? “I want to thank you, [person reading my spine,] for making this the best day-ay of my life.”