ENGLISH JOHN VS. WHITE DAN IN THE WRESTLING MATCH OF THE CENTURY

So I met another Us, who may or may not have a website for Us to inundate. He’s in my English class; his name is John; I call him English John, but not to his English face. Now he has a nickname; already, his Us-ness is clear.

English John reads books. So far, he has only admitted to reading the Bible, but I know he has a secret sci-fi soul and he certainly has the vocabulary of a literature addict. Also, he has a friend (another Us, quite possibly) who makes movies about zombies, for fun. English John got to play an English zombie in the last one, but not English.

Hobbies include: regular head shaving, Bible reading, zombie acting, being English.

I’m planning on introducing him to the rest of you as soon as I can trick him into it. Let’s have a big Us welcome for English John and his fabulous dancing spiders. Except for the spiders.