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August 26, 2002
No spring chicken
Been talking to my uncle on and off for a few days now, as he's here briefly from Hawaii. Talks like a pirate, some favorite expressions being "aye" and "auh?" What with my preferred affirmative of "yarr," we are like a whole crew of suburban buccaneers. (Or, spastics.) Yesterday he was telling me about how the weirdest part about turning sixty is suddenly being invisible to the objects of his ogling, aka women in their twenties.
This made me think again about these older-younger pairings one so often finds, wherein a man in his thirties or so will hook up with a woman who is hovering around eighteen. Or in some cases younger. I was the May to a December one time - or maybe the April, or March - and I have to wonder, how young does she need to be before he's officially a pedophile? Is it a matter of the age difference between them? Or the specific mischief they get into together?
I know a girl who dated her high school track coach. Granted they waited until just after graduation, but still...shouldn't that give you a twinge of ick? Or do most men just shrug and turn on the latest Kirsten Dunst movie on HBO?
Posted by didofoot at August 26, 2002 06:15 PM
Comments
Yes, twinge of ick. Not just because of age difference - the coach-athlete relationship is the thing that icks me a little. Still, different folks, different strokes, world not moving, beat of just one drum, etc.
It's strange to think that once she turns 18, there's really no upper limit on how old a guy a girl can date. Not that it stops being gross - it's just vaguely socially acceptable and un-illegal. My sister dated a 45 year-old when she was 20, and it made me want to barf. Of course, part of it was his long white hair and that Jacob Lilja outranked him at Barnes and Noble.
Posted by: Sean at August 27, 2002 01:18 AM
The rational side of my mind cringes at any relationship that will be so unhappy (probabilistically speaking). So its not a choice I plan to make. Though I suppose I may have a different perspective when I’m 45 and working on my second divorce.
Even so, the decisions of others (that don’t directly affect me) may be different than the ones I would make. The choices we make in pursuit of self-actualization (or blindly, if one prefers) is different for each individual. So for me… I think the Soprano’s is on HBO.
Posted by: MikeAbleXray at August 27, 2002 04:29 AM
Old people smell funny. Never date an 80-year-old. Because you'll pick up the same scent, and it's a scientifically proven fact that smelling old makes you old.
Posted by: Jacob at August 27, 2002 11:13 AM
There's actually a field of science (i'm sure you know it, Jacob) that can actually decipher how old old people are by their smell. The margin of error is only a few weeks.
Posted by: jason at August 27, 2002 01:29 PM
YARRRRRR!
Posted by: ian at August 27, 2002 02:40 PM
another good method is to cut them in half and count their rings.
yar indeed.
Posted by: didofoot at August 27, 2002 02:42 PM
p.s. hey mikable, I notice you put your AGE on your website. heh.
Posted by: didofoot at August 27, 2002 02:50 PM
If I wanted to keep a secret from my friends, my page would be the place to hide it. :)
Posted by: MikeAbleXray at August 27, 2002 10:22 PM
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