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Seeking Moneypenny

Posted by on January 23, 2013

Sometimes I idly daydream about moving somewhere else. Today it’s London — or it was, until I started browsing around the job openings on London’s Craigslist. Holy cow, London is one pervy town. They seemed so polite! Who knew. A few examples from the Administrative Assistant section (which I only went to in desperation after the Writing/Editing section was a complete bust):

P/A Wanted maybe more. (London)

I am a 44 year old property dealer in west London who is looking for an intelligent l girl. I am solvent and enjoy the finer things in life.


Bussy Agency need a receptionist (london)

Busy agency is looking for a new Female Receptionist commission based payment, Exelent telephone manners, maximum 35 years old flexible able to work hard. all london, possibility from work from home. if you are interrested just send mi your cv with a pictr and fone nr!
must speak fluent english


Very Personal Assistant required (London/South East England )

Part-time Personal Assistant required. Must be flexible, broad-minded and willing to go above and beyond the call of duty. Working hours to be negotiated.
Would suit an attractive young lady between 18-35. Ideal role for students looking to supplement their income.
Please reply with two recent photos and some brief information about yourself.


First of all, to whom does this English belong? Because it is definitely not the Queen’s English. Except the third one, which is somehow creepier because it’s grammatically correct.

Second, I guess “personal assistant” has a different meaning in the U.K.? It’s weird though because all these guys seem to want assistance with the same thing and I’ve always believed this was one of the few things men were capable of doing on their own.


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