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Posted by on April 25, 2012

Michele and I exchanged a few emails this morning (as we do most mornings), because she’d just discovered that Tatum Channing Tatum’s* abs (and, I guess, the rest of him) will be playing a stripper in an upcoming film. All I had to offer was my discovery that my neighborhood theater is showing To Kill a Mockingbird tomorrow night, but I felt this was almost as exciting, because Gregory Peck!

Except, “why did Gregory Peck never play a stripper opposite Tatum Channing Tatum?” I wrote. “With the magic of CG, shouldn’t this be not only possible but constantly happening?”

“I dunno,” Michele wrote back.** “I mean I think I like Gregory Peck most because he is dignified and I like Tatum Channing Tatum most for his little mockery smile and no shirt. I don’t think I would like either of them as much if they crossed into the other’s bailiwick.”

If I ever forget why I love Michele — I never do forget, but let’s say for argument’s sake that I got amnesia like in that other Tatum Channing Tatum movie — I only have to look at this email to remember. Who else would use the world “bailiwick” in an email about naked TCT? I might print this out and frame it.

*I can never remember if his name is Tatum Channing or Channing Tatum, so I try to cover all my bases.

**Capital letters have been added to Michele’s contributions because you’re on Carthage, where things get Capitalized. If you want to be all e.e. cummings, head over to Michele’s world.

I got your bailiwick right here.

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