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Man Not On A Wire

Posted by on March 21, 2011

I’ve been getting quotes from a few different companies to see how much it would cost to chop down the two acacia trees in our backyard. These trees are easily six stories tall; great looming sun-eating monsters that have forced all the other plants in the yard to grow completely sideways in a desperate attempt to photosynthesize. Anyway. Today I discovered that all these tree companies are planning to come out here and climb the trees not with cranes but with their bare hands, while holding chainsaws, and cut them down that way.

What the hell? How is it possible that I can’t afford to hire a live-in butler or a chauffeur or a jester, and yet I can easily afford to hire a guy to climb six wind-rattling stories of tree while gripping a chainsaw between his teeth? And now that I know this, what other ridiculous tasks can I pay people to do?

What I really want to know is: is this a normal, reasonable thing for a skilled professional to do? Or is this like when you see the pictures of the guys building a bridge without wires or safety nets and you think “man, people sure were horrible to the workers back in those days,” except those days are today, in your own backyard, and those people are you?

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