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Posted by on January 21, 2010

Been spending the week fighting with my novel’s heroine because I want her to do something foreign to her character, e.g. anything interesting at all, and she wants to stay at home and draw fish and never meet anyone.

If I were really good at this I’d recognize that I myself am this woman, and rather than staying in and writing about a woman who draws fish, I’d force myself to go out and talk to a stranger and visit a new part of town, thus learning exactly how a shut-in makes herself open the door and how it feels to do that. But it’s really raining a lot out there, and inside I have a heater, and snacks.

For the sake of my future test readers, who will be forced to read this story whether it’s entertaining or not, I must kick my proxy out of doors and into a world of substance and adventure. But when she turns around and sees me still wrapped up in bedclothes, warm and dry and drinking my second cup of coffee, I fear our relationship may be irreparably damaged.

On the other hand, most of you are presumably turning to look at me, swaddled and cozy, from your wind-and-weather, outside-the-house jobs, and you don’t hate me. Probably. Much. So maybe it will be all right.

6 Responses to Near/Far

  1. michele

    ok 1) it took clicking thru like 4 websites to sign in to leave a comment. LAME.

    i got so pissed today at this website i was trying to apply to a job on because i had to answer all these short essay questions and then when i tried to submit them it had some error and ate them and i didn’t copy and paste them to a word doc even though i KNEW i should have. anyway it forced me to leave the house for a bit and go to the store and get gas because i was too angry and depressed to stay here. i feel better now. less like the world is conspiring against me and hating me and making me want to stay inside where it is cozy and warm and fish will sleep on me.

    admittedly i now have stupid hateful valentine’s day peanut butter hearts which will make me more bitter after i eat them. they seemed like a good consolation prize at the time. but now i remember why i hate V day. stupid candy.

    …i think being a shut-in is turning me into a misanthrope. and autophobic.

  2. Kristen

    and chocoholic!

    that is awful. screw those guys with their lame application.

    sorry you’re hating the comment sign-ins. I only had to click a couple things cause I’m already signed into facebook, so it’s not so bad for me. after I commented enough on nuala and garren’s blog with the sign-in every time, I kind of got used to it.

  3. michele

    beh. it’s not so bad. i was just being foul.

    anyway you should advocate that i go back and apply to the rot-gut website one because at least the job is in novato and not new hampshire like the other one i just applied to. new hampshire. sooooo far away.

    i was ALWAYS a chocoholic. it’s just gotten worse lately. also i’ve been developing some serious OCDs.

    p.s. there’s this new show on the CW which has liz from roswell. and also is set in portland and about a girl who was in foster care. i kind of love it (there’s only been once episode; my love might not last). it’s billing itself as a cross between juno and gilmore girls. so far it has not been GG-esque. but i see where they’re going with the comparison. it’s called ‘life unexpected’ if you are curious.

  4. Tracy

    darling? can i please be one of the people that gets to read your novel drafts? i love how you write and can’t wait for you to be a famous writer! which you will be. cuz good.

  5. Gene

    Ya, and Mich if you sign in with facebook you get your cute little profile pic next to your post like Kris Tracy and me

  6. michele

    yes i know, but then also my full name shows up. i don’t know if that will be picked up by search engines but i prefer to not leave a track through the internet.

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