It’s not like you’ve never said it was your birthday in order to get a free dessert. This really wasn’t any worse.
We waited until we were just about done with the main course. We were in that picking-at-the-food phase where you still have a few minutes before the waiter comes along and tries to pimp the cake and coffee to you. “Do it,” I said, “I dare you.”
“You shouldn’t challenge me,” said the Lad. “You know I’ll do it.”
“Do it,” I said bravely. He started to stand up. “No, don’t do it, don’t do it!”
“I’m gonna do it.”
“Don’t, don’t do it.”
“Okay.”
“Okay. . .Well, okay, you’d better do it.”
He stood up. “Um, may I have everyone’s attention please?” he said loudly. His is a voice which carries. People gradually stopped talking and looked at him. “Thanks,” he said. I looked suitably bewildered. “In a few seconds here,” he continued, “I’m going to propose to this woman, and I’m a little nervous. So I’m hoping you all can help me out with a round of applause, just to get my courage up.”
Well of course they applauded. And then he did the one-knee thing and said “So what do you think? You wanna do this?”
“Yes!” I said, looking suitably delighted and near-tears with joy. He took the ring off his finger, put it on mine, embrace kiss more applause. I’m sure you can imagine. “Thanks everyone,” said the Lad, with that embarassed/happy smile he does so well. He sat back down and we glowed at each other for awhile while people gradually settled back into their lives.
Well I’m sure you can imagine what happened next: the waiter came over with a discreet slice of cake for two with compliments of the house. Making that the tastiest proposal I ever accepted.
You guys understand we’re not actually engaged, right? We just wanted the free stuff. Did I make that clear enough?
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