Cheerocracy

A few months ago I sent Michele this email:

THERE ARE CHEERLEADERS. IN OUR DRIVEWAY.

Two middle school girls. Doing cheers. IN MY DRIVEWAY, WHY??? I assume they belong to one of the neighbors, but this is…kind of hysterical. And adorable. Heh. Bring it on!

(If you’ve never been to my house, I should mention we share our driveway with the two families next door. So this isn’t that random, but still pretty random, because until this point I was not even aware the neighbors had kids.)

Then two nights ago we were sleeping with the bedroom windows open and suddenly those girls started practicing again, this time in their front yard, very near to our windows. “Five, six, seven, eight!” Over. And. Over. I kind of wanted to yell at them (I was tired), but also I wanted to smile indulgently because it was sweet for them to be twelve years old and so earnest about getting a dance routine right. I remember how fun that used to be.

But really, who lets their twelve year olds go out at that hour on a school night to practice? Crazy drunk people walk past there, and violent teenagers and stuff! Also it’s annoying for the neighbors. It seems really unlikely that parents would be down with this, which is what makes me think these girls might actually be ghosts.

Granted, the first time I saw them they were out in the afternoon, and they were driven indoors by a homeless guy who came and yelled fake cheers at them until they went away, so someone else could definitely see them. But I am pretty sure all crazy homeless people can see ghosts, so my theory still kind of holds water.

A quick search for “cheerleader ghost” images led me to this book which Michele should probably read. And so should I, let’s be honest.