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July 19, 2002
"Throw her in. Throw her in."
This morning I had three eggs for breakfast, and an english muffin. Then I went to Brewed and had a large coffee. When I got to work, I was hungry again.
"How can this be?" I asked.
"Your coffee ate your breakfast," said Carol. "Happens all the time."
Urgh. I don't like when my food eats my other food.
Later, I was browsing around online, reading various Ain't He Cute stories about parenting and feeling good about my impending pregnancy, when I came across this one. Suddenly I felt so queasy that my coffee puked my breakfast back up into my stomach where it belongs. Hey, at least I have my breakfast back. But now I'm worried. What if I, too, try to throw my child in a hole? If these witty, charming bloggers are bad parents then what chance do I have? I don't even have a college degree! I can't even play piano! I only have three pairs of socks!
I think I should practice on a fake baby (a.k.a. a baby belonging to someone else) before I get started on my real baby (a.k.a. baby belonging to me). So if you have a baby you don't like very much, can you please let me know and I will take it for a few hours and practice not throwing it away? Thank you.
Apologies to Michele, who had to hear and subdue this ranting twice.
Posted by didofoot at July 19, 2002 04:15 PM
Comments
subdue subdue!
maybe we could try working in an orphanage for a while and see what it's like? and then if we were married to billy bob thornton we could also get divorced.
speaking of orphanges, nuala, how's that ARF thing going?
Posted by: michele at July 19, 2002 04:45 PM
They are actually good parents, these bloggers. They are just honest about how hard it is. That is why some of us have decided to be childless. The only downside is that there will be no one to put us in a home in our old age and talk smack about us and hope to God we croak so they can have all our left over money and treasures.......
Hiccup, kill me.
Posted by: tracy at July 22, 2002 09:45 AM
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